A Dream of 99 Teslas

I had a dream the other night. Walking in the woods behind my house, I came across a man.  Though he maintained the appearance of an ordinary man, I knew somehow that he wasn’t.

“you’re from another planet.” I told him

He nodded and smiled and walked me into a clearing where his ship was.  It looked mostly like one of those sprinter minibuses.  The interior wasn’t much different than that of a human vehicle, black leather.  There were a few gadgets that i didn’t recognize here and there.

“That’s awesome” I said, and we both smiled big, dorky grins.

“So, “ I ask, “what are you doing here?” reasonable question.

“what are YOU doing here?” he countered, raising and eybrow, and speaking for the first time. A deep voice, with a hint of metal.

I was taken aback, and I answered, “um, I teach yoga, and I help people switch over to green energy”

“Green energy?”  he said, and walked over to the front of his truck, and looked for the latch of his hood.

“Yeah, you know, windmills and solar panels and such”

He tilted his head, and it seemed as if he were downloading the information right into his mind, “You know those aren’t very efficient, right?”

A little defensive, I countered, “I didn’t know that, and anyway, its better that the alternatives, better than coal.”

He found the latch, and unlocked the hood. “Right, coal.  You guys dig up your planet out from under your feet, and set it on fire.  You know that’s stupid, right?”

“What do you think of nuclear power?”

“Oh right, that’s when you dig up the most dangerous materials you have available, on your whole planet, and use it to boil water.  Thats really dumb too.  You know your people aren’t very good that?  Parts of your planet keep getting poisoned with radiation.  Its possible that none of your kind will live to see it restored.  Those plants should at least have an ‘off switch’.”

I look down at my feet, embarrased.  “So, what then?”

He lifts the hood of the truck, and points.  There is a sphere on a post in the center, where an engine usually is.  Its giving off a dim glow.  he lifts it off its base and asks me to hold it.  It’s light and study and warm.  He takes a rag and some WD-40, and cleans the terminal.  I return the globe, and it gets placed carefully back where it belongs.  It glows much brighter now, and the air around us crackles, and fills with a slight smell of ozone.

“You can just pull energy out of the air.  As much as you need.  For free. Safely.  With no pollution.”  He waves his hand over his gnerator.  Its full of swirling colors now, and little sparks of lightning tickle his hand.  He’s showing off.

“One this size could run many, many cars.  Many, many houses.  Forever.  Just remember to keep it clean.”  He winks at me, smiles, and closes his hood. “They cost about five hundred bucks to build.”

Then he looks at me prophetically, and begins to climb into the drivers seat. “There will come a time when 99 Nikola Teslas will come to this planet, and all energy will be free for all the people, and the need to pollute your enviornment to conduct your business will be a thing of the past. “

“But, wait, I sell the green energy…”

He shrugs his shoulders, “What is more important?”

And I wake up.

And I have to concede, free energy pulled right out of the atmosphere is certainly better that cheaper energy collected by windmills.  And even though my green energy project is a nice additional income, i would prefer it if all energy was free for all people.  I’m sure when the 99 Teslas show up, I’ll be able to come up with another way to make a buck.

And so I’ve been curious about Tesla, and two videos really stand out for me.  One is a documentary, available on netflix, called, “The Secret of Tesla”.   The other is a youtube video called “Tesla, Drunk History” by Duncan Trussel.  On the drunk history video, Tesla is labeled, ‘The Electric Jesus’.   It’s a good name.  It seems to fit.  I’m ready for him to come back, and bring 98 of his friends.